Playing cards

You know you're from California when.../Californians are better because...

Everyone hates the cops. Even the cops.

You live next door to mexicans.

You say "like" and "for sure" and "right on" and "dude" and "totally" and "peace out" and "chill" and "tight" and "bro" and "hell of" and "hella"(Nor Cal only) and "faded" and "stoked" and "fo sho" and you say them often

You know what real cheese taste like.

All the porn you watch is made here, cause we fuck better and thats how it is.

You don't get snowdays off because theres only snow in Mammoth, Tahoe, Shasta, Big Trees, Yosemite, Kirkwood, and Big Bear.

You can wear sandals all year long.

You go to the Beach - not "down to the shore."

You know 65 mph really means 100.

When someone cuts you off, they get the horn and the finger and high speed chase cuz we dont fuck around on the road.

The drinking age is 21 but everyone starts at 14 (legally 18 if you live close enough to the border).

Our governor can kick your governors ass.

You can go out at midnight.

You judge people based on what area code they live in, and when asked where you're from, you give your area code.

You might get looked at funny by locals when you're on vacation in their state, but when they find out you're from California you turn into a Greek GOD.

We don't stop at stop signs... we do a "california roll"
No cop no stop baby!

You can get fresh and REAL Mexican food 24 hours a day.(Or Sushi, Chinese, Pizza, Italian, Greek, Steaks, BBQ, etc...)

All the TV shows you "other" states watch get filmed here.

EVERYONE smokes weed. no exceptions.(Almost)

We're the Golden State. Not the Cheese State. Not the Garden State.....GOLDEN!!!

We have In-N-Out (Arizona and Vegas are lucky we share that with them).

We have the most representation in the House of Representatives, which means our opinion means more than yours, which means we're better than you.

The best athletes come from here.

We got Disneyland, MarineWorld, Yosemite....wut now!

We have The Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf which is way better than Starbucks.

We call it soda, not pop.

Oh, and no one from California calls it Cali... that's how we know you're not from around here.

The fastest part of your commute is down your driveway.

You were born somewhere else.

Your sense of direction=Toward the ocean and away from the ocean.

You eat an In n Out burger at least once a week!!!

You know how to eat Artichokes, Beets and Romaine lettuce.

The primary bugs that you worry about are electronic.

Your car has bullet-proof windows.

Left is right and right is wrong.

Your monthly house payments exceed your annual income.

You can't find your other earring because your son/brother/dad/nephew/uncle is wearing it.

You drive to your neighborhood block party.

Your family tree contains "significant others."

You don't exterminate your roaches, you smoke them.

You see 25 lawyers chasing an ambulance.

More than clothes come out of the closets.

You go to a tanning salon before going to the beach.

More money is spent on facelifts than on diapers.

Smoking in your office is not optional.(We're a non-smoking indoors state)

You pack shorts and a T-shirt for skiing in the snow, and a sweater and a wetsuit for the beach.

When you can't schedule a meeting because you must "do lunch."

Your children learn to walk in Birkenstocks.

You'll reluctantly miss yoga class to wait for the hot tub repairman.

You consult your horoscope before planning your day.

All highways into the state say: "no fruits."

All highways out of the state say: "Go back."

The Terminator is your governor

You can't remember . . . is pot illegal?

It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH"

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from California.

Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.

You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.

You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.

You don't care what race people are because you're too busy wondering what gender they are.

You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown and can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.

It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.

Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps. You don't even notice.

Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney IS George Clooney.

Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

The normal symbols on restrooms mean "people wearing pants" and "people wearing skirts".

Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who delivers your mail is into S &M, and your Mary Kay rep is a guy in drag.

Both you AND your dog have therapists.

You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy Blanks himself is teaching the 4:00 PM Tae Bo class.

You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cell phones or pagers.
Playing cards

Freewill Astrology

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

In my view, 2010 is the year you should expand your world.

That could mean enlarging your circle of allies or building a bigger web of connections.

It might mean broadening your appeal or widening your frame of reference or opening your mind to possibilities you've been closed to.

It may even involve extending your territory or increasing the range of your travels.

However you choose to expand, Taurus, I urge you to put love at the heart of your efforts.

Love should be the fuel that motivates you and the reference point that ensures you're always making smart moves.

For inspiration, memorize this line by poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning: "I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach."

In your case, Taurus, "thee" should mean the whole world.

***

Which is what I've always done despite the lack of others to see it.

I Love thee!
I Love thee!
I Love thee!
Playing cards

Celeb Meme.

Ganked from Fb.

Post a pic of which celeb you think you look like.

Here are mine.
I think I look a bit like both of them.

John Barrowman aka Capt Jack Harkness


Orson Welles (young)

Playing cards

Ganked from Poetry

Dreams

Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.

Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.

~ by Langston Hughes

*Which is why I will never, ever, give up on mine! Ever!
Playing cards

Life or something like it.

They say change is a good thing.

They don't tell you about the other half of it.

The past year has found some changes in my life.

New friends, new activities, new shinies.

But as they also say, the more things change, the more they stay the same.

I'm still in the same crappy job and the same dream killing town.

Within the next few years this will change.

For the better.

An old activity I use to enjoy as a child is back in my life again.

Fishing.

About 6 months ago I met up with a friend of a friend who is obsessed with fishing. More like a passion really.

He has a 20ft boat and invited me to go fishing with him & some guys out in the Delta.

Well, one thing has led to another.

And since he has a priority spreadsheet of who's first on the boat, I've managed to work my way into the top 5.

And at times, into the top 3. As his boat will only hold 4 people plus gear.

This last year has seen me Striper fishing catching my biggest ever at 32". Salmon fishing, Sturgeon fishing, crabbing, and on our last trip we went after Humboldt Squid which are about 4-6' long!

The ocean is kinda interesting when you're 25 miles out. The first time out I "hung chow" (puked) even on 2 Dramamine. The 2nd time all I got was weasy, but that's because Kirk puked. I feel that the more I'm out there, the more I'll get use to it.

I even bought my own rod & reel for trolling. The Penn 309M.

I have a lot more to post about, but it's late, my shoulder hurts, and I need sleep.

Another thing that's changed is that I've become a Mafia Wars freak and have been playing it over on Facebook, which is why I haven't been here.

If you wanna reach me, I'm on Fb. Which is interesting and even has a built in chat utility.

But anyway, I'll post more later. Or try to. But for now, I'm off to bed.

G'nite all.
Playing cards

Going going going

I know I haven't been on much here lately.

But with the holiday ramp up, getting home at 1am has become the norm instead of the rarity.

Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, Birthdays, new clients who want everything updated yesterday.

Even this post is made from my work `puter. Something I'm not suppose to do, but hey, he's not here.(Yeah, teh bossman has cracked ze down on communities of any kind. LJ, Fb, Yahoo, etc.)

No wonder I'm either sleeping in the van or at my desk.

I'll try to make a post or two here hopefuly before the New Years.

But I'm thinking about all of you always.

Merry Christmas everyone!